"But what would I do with Mushy Pootm?" you might ask.
Do you have a patch of stubborn, annoying grass that just won't die? Using the amazing chemical properties of Mushy Pootm you can shock that grass right out of your yard.
Tired of your plain, boring, uniformly green lawn? The creative application of Mushy Pootm can turn your yard into a fantastic, multi-toned masterpiece!
Want to show a friend just how much you care? Nothing says "I love you" like a flaming bag of Mushy Pootm on the doorstep.
With Mushy Pootm, the opportunities are endless!
But what is Mushy Pootm?
Mushy Pootm is a complex blend of canine nutritional products, fish, bone, hair, and a secret blend of assorted household and trail-side objects. These special ingredients are combined using an amazing process known as "digestion" and are then deposited on a bed of crystalized dihydrogen monoxide where they are allowed to cure before taking on the fantastic mushy property that is known and loved by dog owners all around the north. And it's all natural!
So how do you get your own "Mushy Pootm? Don't waste your time owning and maintaining expensive dogs. All you need to do is drop by Meandering Michael's residence and choose from our wide selection of inventory.
Now, we know what you're thinking - "But I can't afford Mushy Pootm!"
Well now you can! We're literally giving it away! And not just one or two, but a whole yard full1. There are thousands of Mushy Poostm just for you!
But wait, there's more!
When you come to collect some Mushy Pootm for your home or office, we'll even provide you with an ergonomically designed scooping device as our free gift to you!
Could it possibly get any better than that?
It can! Act today and we'll give you and all the "President's Choice" water-proofed containment and transportation devices you'll need to take your "Mushy Poo" home with you. You'll be amazed at how much Mushy Pootm you'll be able to lift using the conveniently integrated carrying handles.
It can! Act today and we'll give you and all the "President's Choice" water-proofed containment and transportation devices you'll need to take your "Mushy Poo" home with you. You'll be amazed at how much Mushy Pootm you'll be able to lift using the conveniently integrated carrying handles.
Imagine the look on your boss's face when you put a bag full of Mushy Pootm on his or her desk. Priceless!
Impress your family, friends and neighbours when you tell them about this amazing deal.
Comment on this Michael's Meanderings entry right now2 for directions to his yard full of Mushy Pootm.
Don't delay! Get your Mushy Pootm today!
1While supplies last.
1While supplies last.
2Serious inquiries only.
5 comments:
I thank you for your kind offer of MushyPoo. I regret that I have no need of your product this spring. I will shortly be taking ownership of a property which includes it's own Mushy Poo aging bed, neatly fenced in the back yard to make sure the Mushy Poo is well secured. As such, I expect to shortly be opening my own Mushy Poo franchise here in Ontario. I welcome new customer referrals.
Marianne
Neatly fenced? Well secured? Michael's Meanderings MushyPoo(tm) is free range.
Your high-intensity production practices notwithstanding, I wish you the best in your new venture and will add your name on to the Michael's MeanderingsMushyPoo(tm) Production and Distribution Network.
Sorry, Marianne, but Michael wins hands down (eeewww!) with his Northern-themed, free-range MushyPoo(tm) :)
Brilliant! So when you run out of supplies (and you will, because the offer is just that good!), I know where you can get more supplies of MushyPoo(tm). In fact, I already have my supplies put away securely in the same packaging as you... :)
Wow. I don't know how I can compete with pre-packaged Mushy Poo(tm). In light of your competitively superior product, I concede defeat.
Get your Yukon Yahoos Poo-Sludge-in-a-Bag(tm) today!
Post a Comment