We found out around Hallowe'en. It was something we'd been hoping for for a while, so I was pretty thrilled when Fawn told me the news. I was going to be a dad again.
If you read Fawn's blog, then the news of the new addition is no surprise to you. I didn't blog about when I found out. I don't know why. Maybe it just didn't seem real yet. But I still told everyone on Facebook.
When we were in Mexico (more on that another time), things started to go wrong. Fawn started bleeding. At the time, we were told by a friend who happens to be a doctor that it sometimes happens and that we shouldn't worry.
When we got back, Fawn went to the doctor's office and got an ultrasound arranged for this coming Friday.
But I guess there's no point in having the ultrasound now. The child was born. It was just born eight months too early.
While I think Fawn always knew, I was hopeful. I always felt a little glimmer of hope.
I just found out. I found out by reading Fawn's blog. I'm sitting on the bus on my way from Richmond, BC to Bellingham, WA. I'm on my way to get the car I bought on our way to Mexico. The bus has a wireless Internet connection, which I think is pretty cool, but it was very hard to find out this way.
While I'm upset about the child that I will never get to see grow and develop, I'm even more upset that I'm not in Whitehorse with my wife.
It's just not right.
I know that from every life experience there is a lesson. Sometimes the lesson is obvious. Sometimes the lesson will only be revealed when the time is right. Before it happened, I was trying to figure out what the lesson might be. I couldn't find one, and that only made me angry.
It is only now, as I sit on the bus waiting to clear customs, that I understand.
The lesson is that, no matter how important other things might seem, family is the most important thing of all.
I wish I was there with you, Fawn. I'll be home soon.
I don't know what I can or what to say other than deepest sympathies from Dee and I.
I'm sitting here in my office crying for you. I just saw you and Fawn on Monday and I didn't know. I'm so sorry. Deepest sympathies from Kelly and I.
I am so sorry, Michael. Cathy and I send our deepest sympathies to you and Fawn.
Hugs....wish we could be with all three of you. I talked to Fawn tonight, but wish I could talk to you too! I'll call when you get home.
My condolences to you and your family.
I've already talked to Fawn, but wanted to express my sympathies to you Michael. Your post was very heartfelt and dammit, now I'm weepy....
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