Still not good enough.

My mum sent me an e-mail. It's one of those "forwarded to a million people" things, suggesting better attire for clearing airport security more quickly.

Although clever, if I put myself in an airport security person's shoes, I can detect seven problems that would require me to delay these people:

1. They'll still have to remove their footwear.
2. It doesn't matter what's in that bag, she can swing it through the air and hit people with it.
3. Everyone knows that umbrellas contain swords secretly hidden in the handles.  If they don't have swords, the bad luck powers generated from opening the umbrellas inside the plane will bring the whole thing crashing down.
4. Plastic bags can be used to suffocate people.
5. The woman could, potentially, break the lenses on her $1.99 sunglasses and use them as mini knives.  'Cause she might be a ninja.  You never know.
6. The man has got to be hiding something in that hair of his. 
7. And...

...It looks like that guy is concealing some sort of package under his briefs.