November 27, 2009

Where there's a pill there's a way.

I want to thank everyone who reads this blog (either at or on facebook) who snickered at me supported me in my struggle to swallow pills.

Many of you shared your tips and tricks. Hiding pills in my food has been tried on countless occasions. Sadly, it never worked.  The "using candy sprinkles of increasing size" wasn't an option because of the sugar.  Grinding and chewing were all techniques I have used (successfully) in the past. Unfortunately, the capsules that I need to take must be ingested whole or they won't work. They're probiotics and they're supposed to restore some of the good bacteria in my small intestine. There's a special coating on the capsules that will protect the bacteria from the hostile environment of my stomach until they make it into my small intestine.  And for some reason, I'm not very fond of the idea of trying to get them there from the other direction.

In summary, the pills must be swallowed whole.


Well, after thirty-plus years of not being able to swallow a pill, I decided enough was enough.  But how to do it?  I've already tried every bit of advice I've ever been given about swallowing pills.  Taking the pill with a bit of water and knocking my head back has never worked.  Swallowing or plugging my nose and swallowing has never worked.  Putting the pill on the back of my tongue has never worked.  And on and on and on.  In the end, I turned to my old friend, the Interweb.

The Interweb had much of the same advice that friends and family have given me over the years.  I began to feel despondent.  Surely there are other people who suffer or have suffered from the same affliction, I reasoned, What do they have to say about it?

Lo and behold, here was some advice that was the TOTAL OPPOSITE of what I've been told over the years.  I decided to give it a shot.

Here's what I did:
  1. Made sure that nobody else was around
  2. Took some warm soup (making sure it wouldn't have a negative interaction with the pill)
  3. Sat down at the table and relaxed (the warm soup was soothing to my swollen, sprained tongue)
  4. Put the pill in my mouth
  5. Drank a mouthful of soup
  6. Relaxed some more, letting the soup warm my mouth and palette
  7. Tipped my head slightly forward
  8. Let the pill float to the top of the soup in my mouth
  9. Swallowed
  10. Swallowed
  11. Swallowed
  12. Swallowed
  13. Drank some more soup
  14. Swallowed
  15. Swallowed
  16. Swallowed
  17. Swallowed
  18. Drank some more soup
  19. Swallowed
  20. Swallowed
  21. Swallowed
  22. Pushed my tongue forward and lifted the tip of my tongue towards my palette
  23. Swallowed
As you can see, it took me about twelve tries the first time, but the pill went down.  THE PILL WENT DOWN!!!  WOOHOOO!!! It was such a gentle way to do it, I wasn't even sure it went down at first.  I sat there in disbelief.  I tested my mouth with my tongue, but the capsule wasn't there.

Then I jumped up and did a happy dance.

Fawn can attest that I was beaming with pride.

The next time I tried it, it only took four swallows.

This morning, it took only two.

I have conquered my greatest weakness!  Take that, snickerers!

1That gulping wasn't me swallowing a pill whole, of course.  That gulping is the sound I would make any time knew I had to take a pill.


Idania said...

Hey Mike,
I'm using "HMF Super Powder" made by Genestra Brands to increase the good bacteria-we've all finished our share of amoxicillin in the house due to strep throat. It's in powder format and sweet(like sweet powdered milk), so we don't need to do the pill format.

Just something for you to think about. Our nutritionist recommended it.

Have a good (and gag-free!)weekend.

Matt, Kara, Hunter and Cavan said...

What a crazy solution!!! Glad it works for you and thanks for the entertainment! *snicker*