March 07, 2010

Applied mathematics.

Inspired by the accommodations where I was staying last week, I developed the following mathematical formula. In terms of practicality, I think it rivals anything Einstein ever came up with. E=mc2? Psht.

Solve for x, where x is x times grosser than any other gross smell you've ever smelled.

d--> 0


d = distance from baseboard heater (cm)
m = number of males who stood while urinating since the last time the baseboard heaters were cleaned
a = the Aim Factor

The Aim Factor

a = hwb


h = average height of males
w = amount of water consumed (L)
b = amount of booze consumed (L)

Assumption: The baseboard heater is on.


dogsled_stacie said...

Gross!!!! Um, where did you stay again?!?!? Did you check the bed sheets and mattress just to be safe?!?!

Meandering Michael said...

Everything else was spic and span. It was just that one thing. The place shall remain nameless - I don't want this getting out there! I want to see how many more decades of dehydrated urine will accumulate before someone tackles the problem (or dies trying).

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the morning chuckle! I'm afraid I vlaughed so hard I nearly added some some coffee into that foul mix....but at least it was fresh from the cup and not somewhere else.