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August 29, 2008

Immobilize and silence your children in 6 easy steps!

"My house in an abhorrent state of untidiness!  It is in desperate need of cleaning! I want to do something about the seemingly insurmountable pile of house-barf but I can't because my efforts are constantly being undermined by my active child!"
Does this sound like you?  It sure sounded like me this morning.  Fortunately, I know of a wondrous substance that immobilized and silenced my child for an hour-and-a-half.

And it isn't a drug.

Or a gag and straightjacket.

And it's easy to prepare.

If you're a parent with your children, I'm sure you're wondering what could possibly achieve such miraculous results.  You might even be inspired to say, out loud, "What is this wondrous substance?"

Go ahead, I'll wait while you do that.

Done?  OK, the mysterious substance is called...

..."playdough".

I can hear your disappointment from here.  "Playdough?  I've heard of that."  I'm sure you have, but you're probably thinking about the stuff that comes in little yellow containers and looks like it's been made out of toxic waste and  second-hand cosmetics.

I'm talking about the good stuff.  Big, heaping piles of it.  It's soft, yet moldable.  It has a pleasing fragrance, quite unlike the foul stench of the leading national brand of moldable dough.

Armed with her own playdough recipe, my Mum made it for us when we were young.  At the time, I thought she made it as a treat for us, but now I know better.  It is the ultimate tool in the parent's arsenal of child pacification.

Recently, I got the recipe from her.  Here it is so you can use it to occupy your kids, too:
Meandering Michael's Mum's Playdough
1.  Mix the following ingredients:
- 1/2 c. salt
- 1 1/2 tsp. alum (Which should be available in the spice section of your local grocery store. If not, check at your local pharmacy.)
- 3 tbsp. vegetable oil
- food colouring
- pepperment or strawberry extract
- 2 c. boiling water
2. Stir until salt is dissolved.
3. Add 2 c. flour.  
4. Mix/knead thoroughly.   
5. Allow to cool.  
6. Give to kids at table.  
7. Go get some housework done/breathe a sigh of relief/have a nap/engage in your favourite hobby/write a book/visit Morocco/build a spaceship
8.  Store in a sealed container in the refrigerator for the next time you need it.
Peace be with you.




8 comments:

Fawn said...

I got the alum in the baking / spice section of Extra Foods. I'd never heard of it before, but I guess it's used for pickling.

I'm glad to hear your playdough was a hit! I can't wait to taste it. Er, I mean, try it. ;)

dogsled_stacie said...

I LOVE the old-school playdough...mmmm... especially the smell!!!!

Fawn - no eating it, no matter what your weird cravings are! lol

Matt, Kara and Hunter said...

How old was Jade when you first tried it with her? I bet Hunter would just scarf it down!

Meandering Michael said...

Jade didn't even try to eat it, although she rather enjoyed sticking her hands into her mouth after it was put away, so we'll see what happens next time. There isn't anything in there that's not edible.

I seem to recall eating a fair amount of it when I was a kid and the long-term effects have been minor.

Shortly after I gave her the playdough, I asked, "Do you like it?"

She said, "Yaaaaaaaaaaaayeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaahhhh!"

Meandering Michael said...

Jade didn't even try to eat it, although she rather enjoyed sticking her hands into her mouth after it was put away, so we'll see what happens next time. There isn't anything in there that's not edible.

I seem to recall eating a fair amount of it when I was a kid and the long-term effects have been minor.

Shortly after I gave her the playdough, I asked, "Do you like it?"

She said, "Yaaaaaaaaaaaayeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaahhhh!"

Fawm said...

To answer Kara's question - this was the first time Michael made it for Jade. The first time she played with Play-Do(TM) that I know of, was about 6 months ago, after her Aunt Lindsay gave her a Play-Do Fun Factory for her second birthday. She didn't try to eat that, either.

Fawn said...

You've been selected for the "I (Heart) Your Blog" award! Should you choose to accept, you can come get the award from my blog. :D

Lindsay said...

It IS a great way to occupy kids if they don't eat it. Gavin is a playdough eater. To the point where Alex yells "Mom, he can't play with it, he eats it!!!" She gets very upset with him.
But, Mum had made some the other day when we were over and he was much better about not eating it.